I almost had a nervous breakdown in the first aid aisle at Krogers grocery store the other day. I went into the Pharmacy department to acquire an assortment box of band aids. I just wanted ONE box of different sizes band aids! That's all. That box would probably last me about 10 years worth of cuts, is my guess.
As I gazed upon the 5' X 15' jammed-packed shelves of various band-aid products, I felt like I was Alice in Alice in Wonderland when she fell down the hole...
the choices that I had were monumental ~ for one box of band-aids!!
Did I want: anti-biotic or not? Multi-color, flesh tone or sheer? Did I need advanced healing or normal slow healing? Did I want butterfly? Small, Medium, large, extra-large or gigundous?
Was I in the market for: flexible fabric; spot band-aids; knuckle-finger-tip; tough strips (vs. weak, flimsy strips I guess); blister (with or without cushions)...
maybe I wanted a liquid bandage (I couldn't figure out if I was supposed to DRINK it to relieve the pain?)
oh, then....eeeee gaaaads!
THE KIDS SECTION!
MORE CHOICES!
Hurt-free, non-stick (teflon coated,maybe?) band-aids (why is this only in the KIDS section? Shouldn't ALL of these products tout HURT-FREE??);
Our little ones who need a band-aid can be soothed by Batman, SpongeBob, or Scooby-doo to help dry the tears of a boo-boo; or maybe Dora the Explorer or Barbie or Care Bear can help ~ and we cannot forget we have Spiderman and Sesame Street characters to distract the pain!
At this point I was starting to hyper-ventilate over all the choices that I had. I was shaking from head to toe...the pharmacist happened to notice me as I was gasping audibly and apparently distracting other calmer customers. I found him rather rude when he asked if I was waiting for an anxiety medication prescription to be filled.
That remark slapped me into shape and I proceeded to calmly grab the first roll of gauze and tape I could find, headed for the wine department, paid for my purchases and drove home...all the while promising myself I would be very careful around the house not to need any kind of first aid. Although I keep thinking back that Scooby-doo would look kinda cute on my arm...
3 comments:
in our house, those are just really expensive stickers. Slightly more expensive than the dozens of self adhesive stamps that Grif has placed all over our house. He put enough on a dresser to actually mail it...
the ouch-less bandaids are ouch-less because they fall off and dont stick to anything, unless you use a postage stamp to hold it in place
oops that last one was me not sean
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