Who won the "Run for the Roses"?

Hey, did you see the Kentucky Derby?








Every year I make a "friendly wager" with a friend of mine as to the winner of the "most-watched-less-than-two-minutes-of-sports-event".

I read about all 20 of the horses. And I mean I poured over EVERYTHING I could get my hands on about this race for the red flower because after last year's horse-that-had-no-chance-in-purgatory win, one must take every horse as a serious contender.

I studied information about the owners, trainers, sires, madams, linament used, breakfast eaten, number of stitches in the saddle, etc. like I was cramming for a college final.
For the past week I labored so hard over the review of every fool statistic & odds prediction, that I had to make a quick trip to Walmart to get my EYE-glasses Rx increased.

I watched all the hokey interviews with everyone including the second-cousins of the neighbors of the horse's owners"...as well as the entire 4 hours of drawn-out coverage before the final race of the day at the "beautiful, magnificent, phenomenal, pefectly-manicured Churchill Downs."

I was so excited, I couldn't eat a thing but I was downing my favorite beverage (water..what else were YOU thinkin'?) at an Olympic record pace of 2 liters every 10 minutes.

Nature was calling and that's not one call you want to put "on-hold". I waited and waited because I didn't want to miss anything...the parade of the horses into the paddock...the mounting of the horses by the jockeys...the interviews (AGAIN for the 30th time) of the owners as they paraded (not nearly as well as the horses parade) to their respective viewing seats...
and I finally couldn't keep my "caller" waiting any longer...

I must have been too long in MY paddock.

I returned to my couch only in time to watch a woman with a microphone make a ridiculously poor attempt to interview the winning jockey, as both of them were bouncing up and down so much that I could barely interpet every 13th word!

I was stunned...almost in tears as I realized that I had missed the entire flippin' race!

I think that this is the last Kentucky Derby I will invest ANY time in.

The worse thing is..after all that, I owe Sue Blum 10 cents.