A Picture is Worth .....

When you see a picture of you in a group photo, whom do you look at first? Of course, you will gaze at your own image 50x longer than Aunt Ginny in her Dr. Scholl's. You will be critical of your crooked smile, teeth and stance. You will say, "I look fat" or "I sure had a bad hair day" and finally move on to the next picture, after quick, obligatory nice comments about the others in the photo.

When seeing pics of other people's family members, we feign interest and act like these photographic gems should be sent to some contest and you go on to guarantee them top honors, all the while yawning to yourself.

Baby pictures are THE WORST. I don't think I have EVER seen a cute baby picture taken before the age of 5 years old. Ok, I am exaggerating a bit. But seriously, (this is where I get really deep so pay attention)...other than YOUR family members, have you seen a beautiful baby photo when the kid is less than a month old? It is usually NOT smiling...has wrinkles on top of wrinkles, look terribly uncomfortable in the new baby suit it is stuffed in with the smiling teddy bear on it's chest..and has a skull cap usually to hide the forsip prong marks from the recent delivery.

Now, we have celebrities having babies by the truckload lately. And Bradgelina are selling the the pictures of their new twins for over $20 million dollars. I have one question.
WHY? Oh, in THEIR case, the proceeds will go to fund either botox injections for someone's lips or to adopting 1,568 more children from foreign lands. But for other celebrities, who cares what their kid looks like?
Would I, after seeing their mug-ette on the cover of a "reputable" tabloid, be able to recognize them if they strolled by me in the park?
Am I going to cut the photo out and frame it for my office wall?
Will I even BUY the rag that it is printed on or will I merely show it to the cashier and mumble something about the outrageous amount of money we spend on stupid stuff?

OK, I have huffed & puffed enough about this subject. You can tell that I will be boycotting the sale of such trivia.

Do NOT, however, expect me to hand over my back issues of People's Top 50 Bachelors. Now THAT is worthy of press ink.