Ode To a Three Year Old

Birthday # 1 and 2







And a much older fella now....











Happy Birthday, Cooper! You have brought LOTS of light into many lives.

Only Time Will Tell ~

A Powerful Parable

If you're bank credited your account each morning with $86,400 and after 24 hours canceled whatever amount was still unspent... what would you do? Wouldn't you try to draw out every last cent you could... every single day? Of course, you would!!!

Well, we all have such a bank... it's called "LIFE" and it makes a "TIME DEPOSIT" into your account every morning. It credits your "account" with 86,400 seconds and every day it burns the records and cancels out, as lost, whatever amount you failed to put to a good purpose. Use it or lose it... no balance carried forward.

Thanks to Mark Goldstein who recently shared this with me.

March 27, 1998 The Wedding of the Century

This is Sean, my nephew and his wife, Annie-belle.
I am blessed to have both of them in my life. They have added joy, love, warmth, humor (LOTS of THAT!!) and friendship. They are quite a package. I love them a ton and am glad they are staying in Ohio ~ for a while, at least.
Happy Anniversary to this wonderful couple!
May you have another 10 years x 7 in good health and love!

These Shoes Were Made for Walking - to The Cone!

The REAL Opening DAY is here! Yippee!! So I will slip on my new waffle shoes and run, not walk to the nearest CONE!



WHO doesn't like ice cream?





It's been kinda depressing over the winter...no ice cream.

But NOW I'm happy again!

Easter Egg Hunters

Remember when Easter baskets were BASKETS?
Now they come in the form of baseballs, footballs and furry creatures that are unrecognizable to me.
But the kids enjoyed "scrambling" around for their hidden eggs..and big brothers even helped their little sis find the prettiest ones!

Life is good.

I Never Cook Alone

As I was preparing some deviled eggs (aka "stuffed eggs" for those opposed to adding an evil over-tone to their dining experience), I realized how many people help me cook. I may be standing by myself in the kitchen but I am by no means, alone.
As I was peeling the hard-boiled eggs, I remembered that Mom taught me that the eggs will peel better if you let them soak in very cold water for 15 minutes. My friend, Suzer, has counseled me that peeling eggs under a light stream of cool water helps unravel the shell without making pock-marks on the egg's skins. Then as I discarded the shells in the waste basket, I heard the voice of nephew Sean caution me against putting shells down the disposal.

Now it was time to mash the eggs yolks before adding the good goop for the stuffing. I used my Dad's Marine Corps fork because he was the one who always performed this function with that same utensil....for over 50 years. I used to watch him intently as he explained to me (with much pride) that the trick for smooth and tasty eggs was to continuously turn the bowl as you mash.

As I retrieved Mom's deviled eggs plate (another antique), I remember how she told me that 90% of cooking was how you presented the meal. So, I got out the paprika and carefully tapped it's contents over the eggs with just the slightest hint of a sprinkle. Then I put the mandatory toothpicks in each egg to help create a protective tent when I covered the dish with saran wrap.

When I serve these eggs later today, I will think of the past ~ when brother Dave, nephew Brian and sister-in-law Connie would fight over the last survivor.

I may have seemed alone in that kitchen today ~ but I sure wasn't lonely.
It was "eggs"actly how I wanted it to be.

GOD Friday

There is some New Age thinking that purports that "there are no accidents".
Maybe that's true.
I tried three times to type the title of this post as "GOOD Friday" and it kept typing "GOD" Friday.
Growing up as a Catholic, we spent three hours in Church on Good Friday...from 12 noon to 3 p.m. to reflect on what Jesus suffered for us.
Three hours.
Now I wonder who spends 5 minutes.
I hear everyone saying automatically, "Happy Easter" but I don't hear anyone even whisper, "Pensive Good Friday"...
So...
I am taking the "E" challenge...
"Pensive Good Friday to you all.."

First Day of Spring

Happy First Day of Spring!
The times ~ they are a-changin'!
Maybe the flooding will subside..or the sleet and freezing rain will cease ~ or maybe the snow will stop flurry-ing...so the rabbits can come for Easter and the birds can greet the flowers.
Or maybe we will have to TRY to fire up the snow blowers again....

The Day After St. Paddy's Day

Ah, tis sad that some leprechauns never learn their lesson....Brian!

A Wee Bit 'O The Blarney

 
How Much Do You Know About Ireland?
St. Patrick’s name was really Maewyn Succat and was NOT Irish but Scottish with an Italian Father.

A Leprechaun’s profession is.....a shoemaker

The ratio of Irish pubs to people = 1/350

Divorce in Ireland did not become legal until 1997

Irish coffee was NOT invented in Ireland...but San Francisco

What % of U.S. President’s claim Irish heritage?
40%

When an Irish name starts with “Mac-”, it means “son of” ~ but when an Irish name begins with “O”, it means “grandson of”.

Slainte! (meaning “Cheers” or “a “toast to your health”)

Computers, Kids and Embarrassment

I received an email from Shirley, a close friend in her 70's, who sent me this email.
Can anyone else relate other than ME?


I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control, and asked him to come over.
Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I called after him, "So, what was wrong?" He replied, "It was an ID ten T error."

I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired,
"An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again."

Eric grinned.... "Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?"

"No," I replied. "Write it down," he said, "and I think you'll figure it
out."


So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T

I used to like Eric...


Thanks to Shirley I feel just a wee bit better today.

Money Woes?

There seems to be a preponderance of evidence accumulating that points to a recession here in the USA. Although our Commander in Chief calls it a "slow down", our economist call it a recession.
In my myopic vision, I am not witnessing people scaling back in the spending category.
Yesterday a new Swedish store, IKEA, opened about 4 miles from my house and people lined up 3 days early to be able to grab the prized $100 chair that the first 100 door-busters would receive. I had four carloads of people ask if they could park in my driveway and have me shuttle them to the store. I informed them that there were fields of parking a mere 2 miles away from the store with a free drop off service at the door. Apparently over 12,000 people were in the doors of the store before noon, following a 9 a.m. opening.

Later that day, I went to a local restaurant to pick up a carry-out order of a home-made turkey dinner (ok, store-made but it TASTES almost home-made!)
I noticed that on this Thursday night, my dining establishment, along with it's neighboring FIVE others each had jammed packed parking lots and there was a waiting line outside each building! I thought that maybe I had been transported to a twilight-zone time period and it was really some Holiday I had missed.
As I drove away I glanced over at the movie theater parking lot and they, too, had no room to spare.
Did you know that movie tickets after 6 p.m. are $9.25? Apparently these patrons were all using their movie passes given to them as a Christmas present since no one can actually afford these prices when we are in a recession! What slays me are the people who order their tickets on line and go over to a machine to print them out and they will pay MORE money, $1.00, which is more than a 10% surcharge, for the convenience on avoiding waiting 3 minutes in line.

Well, I found out the house next door that was in foreclosure was sold at a sheriff's auction for about $40,000 less than it is worth. The people who purchased it live 1 block away in a house that is worth about twice what they paid for this place. Now it DOES have a pool. The only problem is that the people who bought the discounted house, don't know if they can sell their current home.
I guess too many people spend money at restaurants and movies.

Out of the Mouth of Babes

A 1st grade school teacher had twenty-six students in her class. She presented each child in her classroom the 1st half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It’s hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you. While reading, keep in mind that these are first-graders, 6-year-olds, because the last one is a classic!

1. Don’t change horses until .....they stop running.
2. Strike while the ......bug is close.
3. It’s always darkest before.......Daylight Saving Time.
4. Never underestimate the power of......termites.
5. You can lead a horse to water but......How?
6. Don’t bite the hand that.....looks dirty.
7. No news is.......impossible
8. A miss is as good as a......Mr.
9. You can’t teach an old dog new......Math
10. If you lie down with dogs, .......you’ll stink in the morning.
11. Love all, trust......Me.
12. The pen is mightier than the......pigs.
13. An idle mind is the best way to relax .
14. Where there’s smoke there’s....pollution.
15. Happy the bride who......gets all the presents.
16. A penny saved is.....not much.
17. Two’s company, three’s......the Musketeers.
18. Don’t put off till tomorrow what you......put on to go to bed.
19. Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and You....have to blow your nose.
20. There are none so blind as......Stevie Wonder.
21. Children should be seen and not.....spanked or grounded.
22. If at first you don’t succeed......get new batteries.
23. You get out of something only what you......see in the picture on the box
24. When the blind lead the blind.....get out of the way.
25. A bird in the hand is....going to poop on you.

And the WINNER and last one!
26. Better late than....Pregnant

Wonder what they said in SECOND grade??

Email Spam-a-lot

We all deal with the ignorant emails offering us such "opportunities" as an unsecured credit card with a $50,000 limit only to find out it is a shopping card inviting you to buy from a catalog that feature products that are four times the cost of what you can find at Odd Lots...or how about the $50,000/minute job working 12 minutes a week from home? Gosh, what would happen if I worked 24 minutes? How would I spend all that money?

Of course I can't believe I am related to so many people who have died in a tragic accident in Nigeria (the "accidents vary from a remote-controlled toy plane crash to a cooking session gone hay-wire), but these misfortunes somehow manage to leave me as the only person who can handle the $12 billion dollar estate of my Great Uncle Utu...but I need to send $12,000 so armed guards from Africa can come deliver the money. Hmmmm...

The best junk email that I have had the fortune of receiving was the "opportunity" to earn big bucks to help others become protected from "spammers".
Come on now...a spam email asking me to help put them out of business?
Isn't that kinda like asking Donald Trump what a good hair piece looks like?

I think my spam filter is on vacation.

Wrong Number...Honest!

I have a 1-800 number for my business and when someone leaves a message on that line, I get both an email and a cell phone notification.
Today I received a wrong number from an elderly woman (Sylvia) wanting to order 3 pounds of organic coffee. She left all her personal information (well...I exaggerate..I do NOT have her dress size), including her credit card # and expiration date and 3 digit code on the back of her Mastercard.
Obviously, I felt compelled to call her back to notify her that I did not sell coffee, organic or otherwise. The phone was answered by Sylvia's older sister, Edna. When I tried to explain that Sylvia had dialed the wrong number, Edna repeated everything I said to her sister, without letting me talk with her directly. So, I was literally "tied up" with the "coffee sisters" for five minutes while Sylvia told Edna that the number she called was the number on the can. I told Edna, who repeated to Sylvia, that maybe she should have dialed a 1-888 or 1-877 or 1-866 # instead of a 1-800 # but Sylvia, through Edna, said again, that she dialed the number on the can. She must have said it 7 times! (for once, I am NOT exaggerating)

After hearing what brand, what amount and how much she liked this particular coffee a few more times, I told Edna that I would be happy to sell Sylvia some coffee but it would be from our local Kroger's grocery store and it may not be organic ~ NOR the brand she wanted.
Edna relayed that message to Sylvia and Sylvia started reading the brand of the coffee off the label on her can and of course, Edna dittoed everything said.

I finally told Edna that she would have to call back tomorrow because we were out of her coffee today.
Click.

Now I'm kinda interested in trying this coffee....and I don't even DRINK coffee!

Cousins

Wouldn't it be nice if EVERYONE were blessed with the cousin who was a best pal?
Older Connor and younger Griffin have been buddies for 7 years.
May this friendship continue another 80+ years!

The Joy of Childhood

Question here...has anyone seen any cuter kids between the ages of 1 and 3?
Cooper and Parker Murphy...hopefully siblings and friends forever.

Oh, dear... I hope these kids don't hold a grudge in 2028 because I posted this in 2008.

Shoo, Flu, Don't Bother Me!

I REFUSE to get the intestinal super-bug that everyone I know except my mail carrier, has entertained.

I may just head out for Florida if only the weather would cooperate in stopping the icing on the cake long enough to drive over the mountains!

Super Hero Phone Needed Please

HELP! Save me!
I am without a phone!
"Good gabbing, Batman, how will she survive?"
"Tell her to take deep breaths, Robin! But..I'm curious..how in the cell did is she without a phone?"
"She dropped it in the...wait..no, that was the last time she ruined her cell phone. This time she washed it with her clothes."

OK...I have to admit that I'm just a bit panicky and sure WANT to call on some superhero to get me out of this jam. I rely on my cell phone almost as much as toilet paper. I don't have a "land line" in my name anymore (I know some young whipper-snappers are wondering what a "land line" is!).
What makes this predicament even more annoying is that the city has shut down due to a little nuisance called ICE on the roads. I'm wondering if there isn't SOME cell phone distributor who would brave the elements to come deliver a device to me. But...how would I call them to inquire?

Wait just a darn minute here. I've got to put my thinking hat on.
There.
That's better.
Here I am baby-sitting a 4 month old baby! I'll just use hers!
Super baby to the rescue!

The Facts Are In

The average person has over 1,460 dreams a year.

The longest one-syllable words in the English language are "strengths" and "screeched".

The telescope on Mount Palomar, California, can see a distance of 7,038,835,200,000,000 million miles.

Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

I, obviously, need to go get me some of them minerals and shampoo my hair in them.

A Little Cheating?

Plagiarism...funny spelling, eh? I had to look it up in a dictionary. Whoops..does that mean that I plagiarized because I took that word DIRECTLY from a book?

I'm kinda confused about the recent rukus about O'Bama (anyone with an "O" before his name must be Irish) using a couple of lines from a speech made by a fellow Democrat a couple of years ago. He didn't read an entire chapter of a book...just a couple of lines.

Are there any real original phrases, statements or even thoughts?

I wrote a silly little book for my great-nephew, Griffin a while back. I slapped a title on it and had a few printed and forgot about it. The title was "I Can Do Anything" and was about learning to tie shoes. I never marketed the book and had no intention of it being an even "not-so-best" seller.

A couple of weeks ago, I received a letter from an attorney in California insisting I "cease and desist" selling any of the aforementioned book and that I needed to retrieve any of those that were in bookstores and destroy them "or else"! Apparently their client had spent $200 to trademark the phrase, "I Can Do Anything" and they had published a little kids book and put the phrase on a half dozen t-shirts...in California. I looked on Amazon.com and saw that two other books had the same title, one that had just been release last month. (Boy, are THEY in trouble!)
What was interesting was that they obviously didn't think I was much competition because they offered to "sell me the rights" to use the title for a "reasonable sum".

Wow...Now I'm wondering if I can even SAY the phrase again without being accused of being a "Cheater McCheat"...

Oh, well..I guess I can do ALMOST anything.

Restoring Factory Settings

I'm not sure there is a better teacher than a small child.
Researchers have found that children ages 2-4 were tested and the results showed that 95% of them had a very high creative and imagination score. The same children were tested around the age of 7 and the results had flipped. In those few years something happened that resulted in only 5% of these little ones registering high in these same categories.

Why did this happen?

Here these kids were given great hardware AND software from the Big Manufacturer in the sky. Yet, they get viruses and intruders who wreck their original factory settings of being positive, creative, loving beings.

If life beats us down to this degree at a young age, what is happening to us as we grow up and try to deal with even more "infiltrators" to our internal computer?
Maybe we should just reboot, retool and re-look at what is influencing our original factory settings.

Let's learn from the wee ones.
They still love, hug and show their emotions.
They are positive and think they can do anything.
They find ways to be happy with just two empty boxes because their creative software is still in tact.
You don't see kids at age two telling others what is wrong with them or being critical.

I know I need to look at my personal computer settings and stay on top of keeping my internal software in good order.

What? Do you hear a noise? It's a beeping on my laptop.

Whoops...my computer battery is low so I have to sto

Little King For a Day

Cooper...a Valentine overnight guest who stole our hearts...as usual.

Keep in Mind, My Valentine...

Happy Valentine's Day!
A day to remember whom we love.
A day to send cards, gifts, flowers and candy.
A day florist and retailers enjoy.
A day to say "I love you" to someone who may not be so easy to love.
A day to call someone who is alone and ignored, who maybe won't get a valentine.
A day to celebrate love and being loved...

And then tomorrow we can go back to our normal lives of liking, not loving?

Roll Out Those Lazy, Hazy, Crazy Days of Summer

After yesterday's snow/ice storm I've talked with people who say, "I can't wait for the warmth of summer!" Yep. I'm "down with that" (I think that means "I agree")
When I think of summer, I think of sitting by the pool, absorbing the sunshine and then taking a float (not swim) in the water.
"I just need to relax"..."I need to chill"..aren't those phrases that spill out of the mouths of almost anyone at any day?
People (Sean) kid me about taking a lot of trips. Hellooooooo! I need "a break", Mister! (that word is very close to "minister", isn't it?)

Of course most of us have the lazy gene...more commonly called, "a remote" or a "button". Think of all the chores around the house that we used to have to manually complete..turn on the TV - remote, cook food - push button on the microwave or set the timer on the oven or use the crock pot. Laundry and dishes are washed by pushing a button. I can start my car with a remote! I can have a piano that plays FOR me!
I can push buttons to write and send communication..no more smoke signals for me.

And with all this instant gratification, comes the need to cure our ailments with a quick fix - PILL. Most ailments are stressed induced. Most experts in handling stress tell us to EXERCISE. High blood pressure, high cholesterol and bone loss can be helped by EXERCISE and a controlled DIET.

ABC had a news story about a 69 yr. old woman who was having such bad memory problems, her daughter started to look at whether her Mom needed Alzheimers care. In trying to figure out what cause this, the woman took herself off of Lipitor, a drug used to help with high cholesterol. Within 8 days, she was back to normal. She said, "I didn't want to be the person in the nursing home with the lowest cholesterol." She is regulating it now with diet and exercise. It turns out the Pfizer, the pharmaceutical company who sells this drug did know that about 2% of patients have some kind of memory problem. (we all know the jokes about how the side effects can go on and on for most drugs yet we gotta have 'em!)
I'm wondering if even 2% of people get a benefit from this medication...but that's just MY skepticism of most Rx pushers.

Snow/Ice Day

SNOW, ICE FREEZING RAIN, SLEET, SLUSH, SNOW, ICE, MORE FREEZING RAIN...THAT'S TODAY



And THIS is what a parent will need today...because kids have a day off from school!

A Penny For Your Thoughts

I heard a news story that the penny is costing our government almost 2 cents to mint. So, is a penny really just worth 1 cent?

Is it insulting to use the phrase, "A penny for your thoughts"? Maybe the person asking the question was hoping their pensive pal wouldn't really tell them their entire thought process so it would only be worth a penny.
Maybe we should say, "$5.65 for your thought if you succinctly communicate it in 30 seconds or less".

(Note...the first notation of the phrase, "A penny for your thoughts" was seen in a book written by John Heywood book in 1546.
1 penny invested in a bank in 1546 until 2007 at 5% interest? $43 million dollars!)

I don't know why we have to mint as many new coins to re-circulate as they do. It is a HUGE budget that costs a lot of this freshly minted money. I wonder if they could just not mint the money that it costs to pay the bill of printing the money and say it was an even exchange?

This makes me feel guilty that I have a change jar ~ or that every kid in America has a piggy bank. (with inflation, wouldn't it be more appropriate to have an elephant bank?)
Now I'm thinking here...I've never known any bank or merchant to not have the change needed for my transaction.

I remember when my nephew, Griffin was just 3 or 4 yrs old, he swallowed a quarter. When I was talking with him last week, the now mature 7 yr old remembered the incident in detail. When I asked him if he recalled why he swallowed a quarter, he thought a second and explained, "It was worth more than a penny!"
and, he continued pensively, "I thought the "change" would do me good...just to "coin" a phrase"

Everyone has to be a comedian.

MY Happy Day

This week was my birthday. For some unknown reason, while most people enjoy a birthDAY, mine escalated to a marathon celebration. (for once it wasn't MY idea too!)
I had a surprise luncheon, three dinners and cake made by a 1 and 2 yr. old with supervision by their Mom, niece Annie.

I received beautiful flowers, a new TV, a Photoshop software program, a memory bracelet from my niece and nephew that I doubt I will ever take off, emails, calls and cards from everyone but the Pope (and I'm sure his best wishes are on the way but with his budget, it probably is coming by way of boat). I had nice things said about me in blogs and loving sentiments expressed in many ways. Oh, yeah, and there was some "enthusiastic"(?) singing of "Happy Birthday Cha-cha-cha" and it reminded me that NO Murphy or relation to a Murphy should audition for American Idol.

Wow...I was so so overwhelmed with the attention that I was SURE that someone had a Doctor's report about me that I was not aware of!

At the end of last night's festivities, I told my 7 yr. old great nephew, Griffin, that I would see him tomorrow (for our weekly Thursday after-school 3 hour date).
He paused, looked at me and with a broad smile said, "Oh, is tomorrow my happy day?"
I said, "well, it's Thursday and I get to see you on Thursdays."
He nodded and said casually, "Yep, I call that day my "happy day"...

No, I call that MY "HAPPY DAY"...and a great ending to a magical week. I am blessed.

Finally, John Edwards Endorsement

Finesse exclusive silk and soy protein formulas that smooth and improve the cuticle, strengthening every strand to leave hair more soft and naturally shiny. For hair that's irristibly alluring to the eye and beautiful to the touch.

Lots of Ads ~ Oh, and by the way, a SUPER, Suprbowl Game

Yes, it was Ad Heaven...something for everyone. An ad during the this year's Superbowl only sets a company back $90,000....per SECOND. $2.7 millin dollars for this commercial to be played ONE TIME!
I think I watched 30 of the 32 ads that were run and enjoyed 4 of them. The other 26 must have been written by people who were advertising drugs...and not the pharmaceutical kind.
Yeah, I really want to see Shaq on a racehorse...it COULD have been funny, I guess...
and Carmen Electra ~ doing what?

The hype of this event's advertisements has people going to the restroom on first down instead of at a commercial. People are yelling at the host of the party to come back from the kitchen because "the commercials are on!"

I wonder if the vitamin water will get any revenues, not to mention enough to cover their costs.

I didn't know the Writers Strike affected advertisers but that's the only excuse that I can think of!
Thank heavens Joe tells us that the strike might be over soon. Bet on it!

Maybe Some Wagering Going on? BET on it!

I'll take the Giants and 13 points..
OK...so Las Vegas will allow betting on almost anything that you can imagine. I just read that one can place $$ on whether the first touchdown in the Superbowl will be made by someone wearing a jersey with the number above 44.
You can also waste your money gambling on how long Jordin Sparks (of American Idol not-so-fame) will take to sing the National Anthem.
Point spread for the game = Patriots by 12.5
I'll take the Giants.

(I heard that Ton Brady was dancing too long on the ole ankle last night)

An Oasis of Knowledge in My Desert of Ignorance

Thank you, Good Morning America...thank you, Stanford University.
You have filled my empty "Hummingbird-tumbler" to a drinkable level.
Today you taught me that the male Anna hummingbird likes to impress female hummers in mating season by making a noise that is four octaves higher than middle C.
They fly up over 100 feet to commence a dive-bomb pattern that allows it's tail feathers to create such a "come-hither" sound that females will encourage this dapper dude-bird into her nest.

Somebody actually studied this phenomenon over a two year time span and plucked the tail feathers off a poor fella ~ then rigged a wind tunnel in the lab to simulate this sound. We were told that the feathers grow back in 5 weeks ~ but, uh...what about his libido? He might be humming a different tune!

Whomever wants a job that studies this stuff, raise your wing....

A Good Night

It was a GREAT night. I had a chance to watch, listen and thoroughly enjoy my talented nephew Sean Michael Murphy speak at an event last night. I sat next to one of my favorite people in the whole world, Anniebelle ~ and allowed her to make me laugh, as usual.
I also sat next to Kande Wilson, who had just returned from a mercy trip to Nigeria. She recalled how children with aids were living ~ 16 young ones from ages 5-11, in a two room house with no running water and some charcoal outside to use as their cooking arena. I envied Cande's heart to do the work she does.

Sean was effectively communicating about the Love of Our Father is more abundant than we can ever fully grasp...and that He died for us to be free.
Obviously, (to SOME) this Gift is truly remarkable and how can anyone possibly entirely appreciate it? I know I can't. Especially when the biggest complaints that I have had this week included that I was on hold with the cable company's repair department for twenty minutes and I was having to replace a cracked plastic toilet seat cover. Many people don't know what cable TV IS...or TV for that matter...and a toilet would be a luxury..never mind a seat!
The night was so much more than I can type here...suffice it to say, I'm glad that I went. It put a lot of PERSPECTIVE in my life that I pray I can hold on to for a long while.

And to think that today I was going to write about Dr. Phil and his oh-too-white teeth that are so bright I had to wear sun-glasses to hear him spew his "sage" advice. I kinda wanted to ask him about his "pearlies" and maybe just say, "What were you thinking?"
But I decided on the perspective subject instead. At least he HAS teeth.